I have beautiful children. Would you like one (or both) of them? *giggle*
Just kidding. Yes, really. Although Princess Crybaby has started screeching at us. Now, I know you’re saying to yourself, “but Mom, you’ve been talking about your pterodactyl for almost two years. How is this any different?” And to that I tell you “meat, madam. Meat.” (that’s from Oliver)
Meat, madam, meat. You’ve overfed him, madam. You’ve raised an artificial spirit in the boy unbecoming of his station in life. If you’d kept him on gruel, madam, this would never have happened.
Really. I think the key to docile children must be how much meat they eat. There might be something to that gruel diet after all.
Y’all know I’m kidding, right?