I have beautiful children. Would you like one (or both) of them? *giggle*
Just kidding. Yes, really. Although Princess Crybaby has started screeching at us. Now, I know you’re saying to yourself, “but Mom, you’ve been talking about your pterodactyl for almost two years. How is this any different?” And to that I tell you “meat, madam. Meat.” (that’s from Oliver)
Meat, madam, meat. You’ve overfed him, madam. You’ve raised an artificial spirit in the boy unbecoming of his station in life. If you’d kept him on gruel, madam, this would never have happened.
Really. I think the key to docile children must be how much meat they eat. There might be something to that gruel diet after all.
Y’all know I’m kidding, right?
I know I’ve blogged before about this movie and how it was never funny until I became a mother; then it was the funniest thing I’d ever seen. Ok. So, here’s a new one for you (because I didn’t truly appreciate this scene until Princess Crybaby came along).
I NEVER thought this was funny…until NOW. Princess Crybaby used to eat everything you put in front of her. EVERYTHING. Now, it is a chore to find ANYTHING she will consistently eat. Even *gulp* mac and cheese is a toss-up. Cooked veggies – forget it. We have to hide them in something else. But before I get all frustrated because she won’t eat anything resembling healthy, she won’t really eat much that falls into the other category either. *sigh*
So, we’ve resorted to making noises and funny faces and whatever else we can think of to get her to give us her best little bird impression and gobble up her breakfast, lunch, dinner – SOMETHING.
Too bad she isn’t old enough to teach the little piggy move.
Yes, mommyhood also has two purposes: to inform and entertain. And now, if you’ll excuse me, that’s my cue.
Princess Crybaby had a spotty week. It started out well enough. Sunday, we went to Summer Fun with about half our church. By Wednesday, she was running a fever. Thinking it was teething, we started advil to keep her comfortable. Going into Thursday, she started refusing food, preferring an occasional bottle. Still going with the teething theory, I figured her gums were sore. I knew she wasn’t getting dehydrated and I wasn’t all that worried about the not eating.
Friday, the fever was gone but we noticed a small number of bumps on her legs and a runny nose. Now I knew we had something other than teething. Saturday morning, (Matt’s birthday) the rash had spread all over her legs, onto her arms and her palms and soles of her feet. She was amazingly grumpy and had a really gross diaper, despite ating very little in the past few days. Have I mentioned how much I love google? I put in all her symptoms and came up with roseola; a virus. The symptoms matched. I wasn’t alarmed, it’s pretty minor and passes quickly, but I knew we needed to go to the doctor. The daycare would take one look at those bumps and freak out.
Fortunately, our pediatrician was working the walk-in clinic. He took one look at her and said it was Hand, Foot and Mouth. Same type of illness as roseola, so I was close. He said she was already on the back-end of it and would be fine for school Monday.
Apparently, if roseola is the harmless cousin of measles, hand-foot-mouth is the harmless cousin of chicken pox. It is called a “summer disease” and is easily spread in swimming pools. It is harmless and passes quickly.
We are still trying to figure out the magic combination of rocking, singing, stories and other bedtime routines that will help her get to sleep at a decent hour.
CONCLUSION #1: She is some kind of night-owl/morning person mutant.
She won’t go to sleep before about 10 but she wants to get up with me at 6. Um, that would be ok if she was five or six but she still needs more sleep than that. So, by 10, she’s ready to nap.
I know the right answer is the one that works so I’m trying diligently not to stress about this (as Coach likes to say).
Everything else is going super well. She screams like a velociraptor from jurassic park, eats anything you put in her mouth and is starting to walk!!! She’s hilarious and affectionate and funny and exasperating. (does this remind anyone of descriptions of Munchkin?)
CONCLUSION #2: I see a trend in the personalities of my children: brilliant little whirlwinds that can make you want to laugh, cry, pull your hair out – all at the same time…
Yesterday, I started putting the spoon in her hand and letting her feed herself. Yes, it went right in her hair. It was great fun. Getting the spoon away from her to actually get some food into her mouth wasn’t so fun [insert velociraptor screams here].
CONCLUSION #3: Bananas might not be the next big thing in hair gel but maybe they should be. They are quite…effective at freezing hair.
I intend to fill up her little pool this morning so we can put her in it later today. She loves the water.
Life is good.
Ahhh…the sweet sight of a peacefully sleeping baby. There is nothing quite like it. Especially when it wasn’t achieved the hard way; with 30 minutes of wailing and gnashing of teeth. And that’s not counting what princess crybaby was doing. Haha
Tonight, i tried something different…
I gave pc her bottle, read her a bedtime story and said prayers with her (like always), and then sat there, rocking, until she was calm enough to put in her crib. Then, instead if leaving the room, I sat back down in the rocking chair while she played quietly another 20 minutes, or so. When she was ready for sleep, she began to fuss in that whiny, “mommy I’m so sleepy but I need a little more cuddling” cry. I picked her up and rocked her in the rocking chair about 10 minutes. She was out.
I’m about to go to bed – it’ll be the first night in a week without a headache.
I have officially given up on letting Princess Crybaby cry it out. It feels wrong and cruel and , frankly, Scarlett, I don’t give a damn what the “experts” say. We’re done subjecting ourselves and her to nightly torture rounds.
I sat on the floor, in front of her crib, and let her look at me until she fell asleep. she was hiccuping from crying son hard, but she was peaceful. When I picked her up to soothe her, her little body was clammy from the exertion. This is not the right way. At least, not for us.
I never let Munchkin cry it out and she is a great sleeper. There are some lessons about sleep we might have to wait to teach until she has more language. For now, we will work to find a more peaceful solution.
I downloaded The No Cry Sleep Solution by elizabeth pantley to my kindle app. I’m looking forward to reading it.
She’s crawling!!! About two weeks ago, she decided she’d had enough of this sitting around business, by golly, and started scooting around. Fast forward two weeks and she’s crawling and pulling up to standing on anything sturdy enough to hold her weight.
She really is remarkable. It’s so fun to watch her. it takes me back to the wonder of watching munchkin discover things.
I love being a mommy. It’s the very best job in the entire world.
Munchkin is in the Easter Pageant at UMHB today. She’s missing school which is against my personal policy, but this is a really great opportunity and she’s only missed three days all year and we are down to the last six weeks of school and it’s the last non-testing year and I’m rationalizing. Haha. Can you tell I work in school administration?
Ok, it’s time to get ready to take the kiddo to Belton. Y’all have a great day!
Ok, so I chickened out on the squash and green beans. THEY ARE AWFUL. I can’t stand the smell of pureed squash. haha
But, we DID try meat. And she loves it!
Only one store in town carries this brand *sigh* so we are pretty limited. The word from other moms in the aisle is the gerber stuff is pretty icky. This stuff is a combination of chicken, sweet potato and brown rice.. Pureed it tastes like….sweet potato grit. Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure this is primo for baby food meat (let’s be honest, chicken by itself tastes awful). Most importantly, Princess Crybaby thinks it’s fantastic so I love it and we stick to this brand exclusively for our meat consumption..
Otherwise, eating is going well. She’s not as roly-poly as she was because she is starting to scoot around. Not quite to crawling but she’s getting really close.
Speaking of, I’d better jump off and check on her. Tata!
Ok blog lurker peeps: I need you to weigh in on the baby food meats.
I think we’ve done a great job with fruit and veggie picks but I can’t remember what I did for meat. Not to mention baby food tastes better than it did when Munchkin was a baby.
We’ve now introduced:
Table food – we’ve tried a saltine cracker (or two) and little bites of plain mashed potatoes. She wasn’t crazy about the potatoes at roadhouse but she liked my mashed potatoes just fine (probably because mine are finer and have butter).
She can sip (with great mess) formula out of a cup but she doesn’t really understand what (or why) she’s doing it.
She’s truly a Corley – there isn’t a food (so far) she hasn’t liked. Now, we haven’t tried green beans, squash or any of the other “hard core” vegetables. Or meat. I’ve been trying to stage into those, as her palette matures. I’ll probably pick up a squash and a meat this week to try over Spring Break. (next week)
Wish us luck.
OH this baby. She naps like a pro in the morning. But, come afternoon, when Mommy wants to nap, there comes a battle of wills. Oh, she’s sleepy. There is much ado with yawning and eye-rubbing but she firmly refuses to actually go. to. sleep.
Good parenting tomes direct me to put her safe and snug in her bed and let her fuss it out. They’ve never met the iron will of my little tyrant.*laugh*
Successfully introduced cereal, bananas and now sweet potatoes.
She loves to eat. I am still figuring out the right amount to give her and when to time formula. Today, it felt like we either ate something or made a bottle every couple of hours.
Not an easy schedule when I stayed home sick today. But, it’s still the best job in the world.
I had so much fun today, even though I felt awful.
Two scoops of cereal today and four ounces of formula. She loves to eat. I want to try bananas today but that requires a trip to the store and I hate that place. “honeeeeeeey”
Solids just sailing along. I think we might try bananas this weekend.
I put a cheerio in front of her today, just to see what she would do. She picked it up, then dropped it. I wouldn’t have let her eat it yet, but I was curious as to what she would do.
I found this on fb and it’s hysterical. It’s complete drivel but oh, so, funny. Parents, enjoy.
1. Go to the grocery store.
2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.
3. Go home.
4. Pick up the paper.
5. Read it for the last time.
Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their…
1. Methods of discipline.
2. Lack of patience.
3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.
4. Allowing their children to run wild.
5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child’s breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior.
Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.
A really good way to discover how the nights might feel…
1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner)
2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.
3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.
4. Set the alarm for 3AM.
5. As you can’t get back to sleep, get up at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.
6. Go to bed at 2:45AM.
7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM.
9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive)
Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.
Can you stand the mess children make? T o find out…
1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.
2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.
3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.
4. Then rub them on the clean walls.
5. Take your favorite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.
6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?
Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.
1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.
2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.
Time allowed for this – all morning.
Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don’t think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don’t look like that.
1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment.
Leave it there.
2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.
3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Sprinkle cheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot.
4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.
Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week’s groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.
1. Hollow out a melon.
2. Make a small hole in the side.
3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.
4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.
5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.
6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.
You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby.
Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years. (I know, you’re thinking What’s ‘Noggin’?) Exactly the point.
Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying ‘mommy’ repeatedly. (Important: no more than a four second delay between each ‘mommy’; occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required). Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.
Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the ‘mommy’ tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.
This is all very tongue in cheek; anyone who is parent will say ‘it’s all worth it!’ Share it with your friends, both those who do and don’t have kids. I guarantee they’ll get a chuckle out of it. Remember, a sense of humor is one of the most important things you’ll need when you become a parent!
Haha… today started off with a bang. Princess Crybaby only wanted her morning milk warm, thank you very much mommy, OR ELSE.
In what is sure to be an indicator of the future, she wailed at me until I remade the bottle to her satisfaction.
I wonder if this is a new phase. Now that we’ve started cereal, when she wakes up and it’s time to eat, she is almost hysterical as I get her bottle ready. Like she’s trying to communicate she only has moments to live, MOTHER, and how on EARTH can I deny her the life-sustaining food she so desperately needs?!!!? *laugh* Then, of course, when she is given food, she’s back to being the happiest baby I’ve ever met. Does this hot/cold approach remind you of somebody? …. me neither.
This forward progress in the food area has caused a temporary (please God) setback in sleeping. Her naps during the day haven’t really changed but she’s been getting up every couple of hours at night. This is VERY hard on Mommy’s brain. I feel a little like we’ve gone back to square one. I’m not sure how to help her. I would try letting her fuss it out but she’s got some SERIOUS lung power and fussing turns into a full-fledged screamfest in a matter of moments – it wakes up the entire house. Munchkin gets back to sleep pretty quickly. The idiot boy dog, however, is not nearly as accomodating.
So, I get up every two hours, hoping she’ll bounce back out of it.
Gave Munchkin a turn with the spoon this morning. Princess Crybaby was, again, a little confused, but ended up successfully eating two or three spoonfuls. Success! Baby is learning! (Mommy is remembering)
The best thing about all this is remembering this process with Munchkin and, I think, that makes this even more fun (and less worry-filled). Instead of worrying I’m not doing it right, she isn’t going to learn or some other insecurity, I can relax and enjoy the mess.
She wasn’t sure what to do but she was very enthusiastic. Well received – will call this a successful start.