stroller, diapers and wet wipes – oh my!

The Stowaway has officially graduated to “Princess Crybaby.”  She’s here!!!  She made her arrival Thursday, August 26 at 2:14pm.  She weighed 8lbs, 1 oz and was 19 inches long.  She has red hair and blue eyes.  She is a doll baby; much like her older sister. 

The first night home was excruciating.  The second night was MUCH better and we’ve had a great day today. 

Adjusting to all the visitors, animlas and “normal” life may prove to be a challenge but we’re up for it.  I’m going to take some pictures of her tomorrow for the baby book. 

I know this is a short update but I wanted to get something posted.  More to follow in the days ahead as we get in a sort of routine. 

I know this time with her is only temporary and, while I will not dwell on it, I can already tell you it’s going to be a very hard time five and a half weeks from now when I have to go back to the world of adults and other peoples children. 

I will be thankful for this time and will treasure it as a gift.  I will resolve to enjoy the time with adults and look forward to time with MY children every afternoon.  This will be my resolution.

For now, though, I’m looking forward to getting to know this little girl who has been my constant companion these past months.  She is already a delight.  I didn’t think it possible that God would give me another child to adore like I adore Munchkin but He did.  I am so blessed.

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letter to Munchkin

my sweetest punkin’ brains

That was one of the names I called you in the hospital.  I will never forget the feeling when they gave you to me – a feeling of utter astonishment that I could have made something so beautiful.  Do you know I still feel that way every time I see you?  Just the other day I caught myself having that same feeling of breathless disbelief that something so wonderful could have, at one time, been part of my innermost parts. 

Munchkin, you are my treasure.  You are one of the very best things that has ever happened to me.  I love everything about you.  I love the way you make up silly songs.  I love the way you dance through life.  I love your pouts and dramatics.  I love listening to you read.  I love watching you sleep.  I love listening to you breathe. 

I know my being pregnant has caused you to question your place as the apple of my eye but I hope to show you every day that my heart is WAY big enough for everybody.  The Stowaway is going to be just as precious to me, in her own way, but you will always be my first. 

You were the girl who mailed her pacifiers to Santa Claus. 

The girl who defied an entire school and potty trained when SHE, not some uppity woman, was ready. 

The girl who decided one day to read and can now read anything you put in front of her.

The girl who is a dancer, singer, cheerleader, gymnast, acrobat and clown – all at the same time.

The girl who loves to laugh almost more than she loves to eat.

The girl who will slay a thousand dragons in her time because she’s so smart, sassy and confident. 

My girl.

I love you so much, Munchkin.  You are the greatest gift God ever gave me and now He’s giving me another one in your little sister.  I can’t wait for snuggles, kisses, headaches, tantrums, hysterical laughter, tears, jokes, songs, books – all of it – with BOTH my girls. 

Love you lots and lots and lots,

Mommy

end of the road in sight

Like it or not, little Stowaway, your arrival is imminent.  I know you might have it in your stubborn little brain that you can choose to stay in there forever but that’s just not so.  I’d love to see you before next Thursday but next Thursday IS the day when we will see you. 

We have a doctor’s appointment today and I am hopeful that we will have made enough progress to go across the street.  Coach doesn’t think so (I think he just says that b/c he wants to win the bet) and Munchkin is kind of hoping you’ll wait now so she can bring home the new puppy.  I’m tired of the waiting but I’m even more tired of wondering when it will happen. 

Yesterday was a great day – completely exhausting, but great.  We changed our back to school event from a convocation to a professional development conference.  SO much more relevant and I think the teachers got a lot out of it.  I did a session on social networking and how it can be dangerous to your professional reputation.  Hopefully, it was informative. 

I will post pictures of the baby dog tonight, unless we’re having a baby.  🙂

emotionally drained

The excitement of the past weeks has caught up with me, I guess.  Getting everything ready for the move, moving, setting up the new house, having Munchkin home and waiting for the Stowaway has proved to be more emotionally exhausting than I’d anticipated.  As my mother says, “even good stress is still stress.”

I had a horrible dream last night.  I dreamed the Stowaway was stillborn.  We’d come all this way only to end up with a terrible tragedy.  I know it’s exhaustion.  She’s moving.  The movements are smaller but that could be because we are getting close and they always settle down right before delivery.  But, last night and early this morning, my brain came up with a horrifying alternative; something is very wrong and that’s why I still haven’t gone past this early labor business.  And now, she’s in trouble. 

If I still haven’t gone into labor tomorrow, I’m going by the doc’s office, just to hear her heartbeat and reassure myself that she’s ok in there. 

I hate this.  I hate feeling so exposed and vulnerable. 

I just want it to be over and her to be here – safe. 

Stowaway, you don’t have to come until you are ready but please be ok.  God, you are in charge of this and I totally trust your timing.  Hold the Stowaway in your hands in these last days before her birth – then I will know she’s safe. 

*sigh*

ugh

I hate waiting.  I know it’s better for her to be in there and she’ll come when she’s ready and it’s almost time and it won’t be much longer. blah. blah. blah.

No, I am not a patient person.  Yes, I am tired and cranky because I was up until nearly 2am with our “practice run” to the hospital.  Why is it that when you are at home the contractions are timing exactly as they should, bringing tears to your eyes and making you feel like you are actually getting somewhere?  BUT, when you get to the hospital, everything stops or slows down to just “irrritability” contractions – contractions that are still timing ok and have some strength to them but aren’t long enough to really make progress.  I did laugh when she (the nurse) called them irritiable contractions – she was certainly right about that. 

By midnight, I’m a pretty irritable person.  By 1:15 am, if we aren’t actively in labor, I want to go home and sleep.  And that’s what we did – after a run to Jack in the Box.  *laugh*

Coach was a total champ last night.  He made me laugh – putting latex gloves on his head and telling his goofy jokes which, under the stress of the moment, made me laugh hysterically.  He held my hand when I cried out of frustration (I hate practice – I want the real deal). 

I will say this about practice though: we did have a chance to figure out our strategy for getting everybody in the car (including a very sleepy Munchkin), getting her to Mom & Dads, make a few phone calls on the way and get there in good time.  I guess that’s something…

So, it won’t be long.  We DO want her to stay in there as long as she needs so she will be healthy.  And I know she’ll come when she’s ready and that’s ok with me.  Really.  But, Stowaway – can we please save our practice runs for daytime hours – Mommy is NOT a night owl like Daddy.  Thanks.  Love you.  I can’t wait to meet you.

Gripey.

I feel entitled to, on the rare occasion, just gripe. 

Gripe because I’m hot.  I hear the news reports of the “critical” heatwave in the northeast and my pregnancy hormones want to scream back at the TV, “SO WHAT?!  I live in Texas, people – it’s ALWAYS hot like that – get a fan and get over it.”  But that’s not very nice.

Gripe because I’m TIRED of my back hurting.  I swear I walk like a sway-backed mare.  The Stowaway is riding in a ball and she’s really low in my uterus so my back is just killing me. 

Gripe because I’m hungry alll the time but when I DO eat, I can’t eat more than a few mouthfuls because the Stowaway is squishing my stomach! 

Gripe because the time is totally dragging.  I feel like I’ve been 32 weeks FOREVER.  I want her and I want her NOW. 

Gripe because I don’t really want to be at work but if I go home, I’ll just be reminded I still have an entire house to pack… 

Gripe. Gripe. Gripe.

….

I try very hard to NOT be a gripey pregnant person.  In fact, it’s been remarked that I’m one of the more easy-going pregnant people some have met.  This is not my first pregnancy so there aren’t very many unknowns in this (at least of the stuff I can control). 

I don’t know if it’s just a combination of wishing I was home, hot, hormones, or whatever but today is a day when I just want to be anywhere but where I am.